19 Nov 2013

Introspective meme

Now thats just my luck: 
it s been a while now since I last participated in the monday blogger challenges by Strawberry Singh
And just now when I feel I have some extra time to spend on this week`s meme, 
she comes up with the introspective meme
For me this means some extra thinking here! 
Oh my.... someone should tell Strawberry to lower her expectations a little next time 
- after all I m not as young as I my avi looks and every extra effort I undertake takes up more energy each time. 
Plus: each time I raise a finger to type a word I become more and more aware of my real age. 
Please be easy on me, dear Strawberry...
It´s becoming more and more painfull... lack of sleep, blisters on my fingertips and after this meme: 
too much introspection. I want to put my feet up instead.

  1. Regardless of your current number, how old do you actually feel? – hmm actually I m not sure how to put into numbers how I feel. I dont feel like I did 10 years ago, when I thought that everybody around me was acting like grown-up persons while I was still wondering how to get into that state of being grown-up.  But on the other hand I am quite at peace with myself at this point, looking back at what I have achieved in life so far and looking at the path I walked down in order to get where I am and become the person that I am today. Still the number itself which is my rl age sounds far too old for my taste. But I wouldn t want to go back to being 18 again tbh.            
  2. Which is worse, failing or never trying? – My answer to this kind of question could be: "never trying" ;) But that is not my way of looking at life, really. I think the task of lfe is taking on those challenges that life presents us with and finding a place in life and living life sensibly. I try to find a state of happiness and peace :) I don t have big dreams I feel I need to accomplish. What I think is this: If you want to be a painter, get the easel and start painting - see how far you can go.
  3. If the average human life span was 40 years, how would you live your life differently?  hahaha, well if I had known this advance I wouldnt be a mum today! I m glad I will live to be a hundred :))
  4. Are you more worried about doing things right, or doing the right things? – Hm... I am a person who wants to do the right thing, but not preferably those things that are being expected.
  5. Would you rather be a worried genius or a joyful simpleton? – well can t say a joyful simpleton because a joyful simpleton wouldn t bother answering this question, would they. They would probably just smile and be happy and wonder why anyone would be as crazy as to worry about things.
  6. Have you been the kind of friend you want as a friend? – wow... would I recomment myself as a friend to others? toughy! I have a few good friends from my schooldays, I have a good friend I found in Sl who is a RL friend now. So I guess to those people I am a friend worth having and thats reference enough in my view. I am grateful for these friends and I tell them.Also to make sure they are grateful to have me as well. haha ;)
  7. Do you remember that time 5 years ago when you were extremely upset? Does it really matter now? – Well I remember a time 4 years ago when I had to face something extremely sad and when I felt very helpless and wished I had done more to help someone who wasnt able to deal with the backdrafts of life. But at that time I didn t know how to help tbh. Today I know what would have been required and I am more sensitive today when it comes to giving support and comfort to others even when they dont ask for it directly. I guess I learned to read the signs better.
  8. At what time in your recent past have you felt most passionate and alive? – I d say: this summer when I realized I can run a distance  of 5 km in one take (yeah!) without slowing down or having to take a break! hahaha. Silly, ey? But you see: I always hated running and exercises but when I realized I can kick my own ass accordingly and actually see progress it made me pretty proud of myself. I didn t get too passionate about running itself anyway but hey - I got close! ;) 
  9. If you just won a million dollars, would you quit your job? – no. I would use the money to let my two RL collegues at work  keep their jobs since they re going to be out of their jobs in january.( yea - I know... "awwww" ;)
  10. If you knew that everyone you know was going to die tomorrow, who would you visit today? – There wouldn t be enough time to fly to australia and italy and all the other places in one day so I wouldn t try. But I would call everyone who is important to me and gather my family around me.
  11. What do you feel is the difference between being alive and truly living? – A life without being able to express myself and develop my personality or share meaningful moments with someone else wouldn t be a happy life for me.
  12. If we learn from our mistakes, why are we always so afraid to make a mistake?  - Because sometimes our mistakes effect other peoples` lives in a negative way.
  13. What would you do differently if you knew nobody would judge you? –Just about everything - lol
  14. If you could offer a newborn child only one piece of advice, what would it be? – "Don t look at me that way!.. It s not gonna make me pick you up and take you hoooome!!"
Ok, this wasn t too difficult to do after all. I admit. I ll just take pill against the headache now... 
oh wait... can t walk - my legs disappeared...damn those alpha layers.

But please: no pitty. I can still fly :)
 Have a wonderful week, everyone,
Hills :)

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